Give Me My Crown Back
I told the moon I missed you, and the stars sent you back. --Treka L. House
I can no longer be convinced with words that drip from your lips like sugar water, because when they fall upon my lips, they taste like mud. I refuse to listen to the empty banter that you pour into unsuspecting ears, that seemingly makes it’s way into my forgiving thoughts. I just won’t allow you to bury your bullshit into my mind anymore, as you water it with more tall tales and treachery; stealing what was built in me. I will not open my heart back up to you, as it’s too full with repaired pieces of me. I prayed a hedge over my life, and when I did, the light around me denied you entry. So for now, I’ll sit with my legs folded, watching you fail at reaching me, for I cannot be found in chaos or in places lacking love. My soul can’t dwell there, so there’s no need to visit. I am who I am, a spirit full of purpose that will remain mine and one of which will only be touched by souls gentle and pure. Keep tossing your dull daggers, for the handle you hold is sharp and you’ll end up cut before me. Did you forget that my life traveled to this earth with limitless favor? Continue to shoot your rotten words meant to dismantle what the creator built, you’ll look around and you’ll be gone. Gone in a sense of not existing within my realm. I am who I am, and if that bothers you the way that you show me it does, run away from me and never look back. See every time you throw a stone to break me, you unknowingly destroy a piece within the shell of who you are, whoever you are. Do you know who you are? I know who I am. I’m a woman dressed in flowing brown skin, sent to build you for your purpose, but I’m too much for you. My love confuses you, my light blinds you and boundaries sets off rage within you. My strength is real and rare, just like me. You can’t afford me, since I belong to a King. A king who shared his precious gem with a soul unable to care for someone so unparalleled. You tried to box my wings, because you never learned to fly. You tried to create roadblocks to alter my journey. But when you belong to a King, he’ll restore the path he set for you. So for a brief moment, as you were comparing me to beings that can never compare, I forgot that I was royalty. I allowed you to toss my crown while I was trying to help you find yours, and that just won’t do. I’m imperfect from the shape of my head, to the curves that kiss my body. My mistakes have been burned and blown into the universe to grant me peace for what lies ahead. I’m done bathing in the guilt and shame of not feeling like I’m enough. I’m more than enough, sometimes I’m too much. And that’s not a curse, it’s a blessing. Everyday the sun, the moon and the stars are a reminder that I have work to do, work I was meant to do on my own. So I’ll float on back to the course meant for me, and if you’re optimistic, you’ll walk with me. If not, leave me be, so I can finish my spiritual odyssey in peace.